Period sex can be bloody, it can be messy, and it can be incredible. The hormonal changes that come with your period mean you might see a surge in your libido during that time of the month. Some people even report having more intense orgasms while they’re on their period.
Of course, not everyone loves period sex. In fact, one survey indicates that it’s roughly evenly divided: 55% of people thought period sex was “natural or awesome,” while 45% found it “kinda gross.” Even if you’re okay with the blood, some people experience cramps, bloating, pain, or fatigue during their period and would much rather curl up in bed for a nap.
If you don’t feel up for period sex, no problem — there are plenty of other days in the month. But if you do want to have period sex, here are some tips for having the most fun with the least mess.
Why does period sex feel so good?
Fluctuations in hormones during your period can indeed heighten sexual desire. A study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine (2009) found that some women experience increased libido around menstruation.
Some people find their vagina and vulva feel more sensitive during their period too. That can be a double-edged sword: For certain people, it may be too sensitive to want to have sex; for others, it might be just sensitive enough to bring on a truly powerful orgasm. The key is to do what feels good and right to you.
The best positions for period sex
For those open to trying period sex, minimizing mess is a key consideration. Anything that mitigates the intensity of intercourse or puts you in control is probably a good idea. And remember, you and your partner can always experiment to determine what angles, positions, and depths of penetration work best for both of you.
1. Spooning Sex
Spooning Sex is a tried-and-true favorite for a reason: It’s cozy, hot, and intimate all at once. And since it’s a position that puts you and your partner on your sides.
Start by lying on your side with your knees bent, and invite your partner to spoon you. From there, they can penetrate you as slowly and gently as you want them to. Remember, the closer your knees are to your chest, the more acute the penetration angle will be. So adjust your knee position to intensify (or de-intensify) stimulation as you see fit.
2. Cowgirl/Reverse Cowgirl
Another classic that’s excellent for period sex? Cowgirl. (Its equally classic little sister, Reverse Cowgirl, is also period sex-friendly.) Positions that put you on top leave you in control of the stimulation, so sex can be as intense or gentle as you want it to be.
Ask your partner to lie down on their back, and climb on top of them, with one knee on either side of their body. Face your partner for standard Cowgirl, or turn around to face their feet for Reverse Cowgirl.
If you want to change things up a little, ask your partner to sit up (while keeping their legs straight forward). This will allow them to grab your butt (if you’re facing forward in standard Cowgirl) or your boobs (if you’re facing away in Reverse Cowgirl).
Small changes like this can spice up a tried-and-true position without intensifying the depth of penetration.
3. Face-to-Face
Ask your partner to stand up and bend their knees until they’re shorter than you. Meet them face-to-face, and slide onto their penis or strap-on at a speed and depth that feels comfortable to you.
The Face-to-Face is an excellent alternative for those who prefer a position that puts them on top, but who want to try something a little more out-of-the-ordinary than Cowgirl or Reverse Cowgirl.
Standing sex is always a bold move — and why not use your period as an excuse to try something new?
4. The Chair
Ask your partner to kneel on the bed with their legs totally bent and their torso sitting straight up. Then, squat until you land in their lap, and lean your back into your partner’s chest. When you sit, be sure to slide onto your partner’s penis or strap-on. You can then grind and move around in whatever way feels best for both of you.
The Chair puts a fun twist on Spooning Sex by (comfortably) turning it upright. It also gives you total control over the depth and intensity of play.
5. Twister
Ask your partner to sit on the bed, with their torso upright and their legs straight in front of them. Then, sit with your butt between their knees, and do the same. Once you’re both face-to-face and a little intertwined, you and your partner can wrap your legs around each other. (You can also leave them straight ahead, if that’s more comfortable.)
From there, you can pull each other closer to enjoy a little low-key penetrative intercourse. Or you can engage in some mutual masturbation. The Twister maximizes eye contact while minimizing penetrative intensity, making it all kinds of intimate.
6. Head-to-Toe
Think of the Head-to-Toe as spooning sex with a twist: Instead of being head-to-head and toe-to-toe, you and your partner will both be head-to-toe.
Lie down as you would if you were spooning, but bend your knees a little less than usual. Ask your partner to lie down behind you, facing the same direction as you are, but with their head facing your feet and their feet behind your head.
You may have to play with the position a little to make sure your genitals line up, but once they do, your partner can penetrate you with their penis or strap-on, and you can gaze into each others’ eyes throughout intercourse.
7. The Lotus
Have your partner sit down with their legs crossed in front of them, and then sit on their lap, facing them, with your legs wrapped around their back. From there, you can grind, move up and down, or do whatever else feels good for you.
The Lotus is a little sweeter and cozier than classic Cowgirl, making it an excellent position for moments where you prefer the slow and sensual to the fast and intense.
A few things to consider:
- Sexually transmitted infections (STIs): You can still transmit STIs during period sex. There’s some possibility you might be slightly more susceptible due to cervical changes. Use a condom and get tested regularly to reduce this risk.
- Pregnancy: While less likely, pregnancy is still possible during your period. Sperm can live for several days and ovulation timing can vary. If you don’t want to get pregnant, use birth control.
- Mess: Period sex can be messy, especially during heavier flow days. Sex might be less messy towards the end of your period.
Are there any benefits of period sex beyond pleasure
Orgasms during period sex can provide a surprising benefit: cramp relief. Pelvic muscle contractions during orgasm can help alleviate menstrual cramps. Additionally, the well-documented benefits of sex – stress reduction and emotional bonding with your partner – also apply during your period. The Mayo Clinic highlights the positive impact of sex on overall well-being.
Remember:
- Period sex is a personal choice. There’s no pressure to engage in it if it doesn’t feel right for you.
- Listen to your body and prioritize comfort and safety throughout.
By understanding the facts and approaching period sex with an open mind, you can make informed decisions and potentially discover a new dimension of intimacy.
